Question: I recently lost my son Christian at 20 weeks pregnant On 12/12/09. It wasn’t until after I delivered him (four days and 10 hours in labor) That we found out he had passed away from ABS (Amniotic Band Syndrome). I saw and held My tiny baby boy ( Christian Angel), 800 grams 6inches long...He was so perfect in everyway, though he was not fully developed he still had 10 little fingers and 10 toes, a little baby mouth, nose, ears eyes...I feel because My son was so small nobody around me really knows how much he meant to me, Big or Small that is my son and I love him so much.
Some days I sit in bed and cry and others I pretend I am over it but I don’t think I will ever get over My child. I often can’t sleep because all I do is think about every tiny detail of what happened at the hospital..... 1 out of every 12,000 babies are born with (ABS) alive but I don’t understand why know body knows how many babies die from it or the cause???? Sometimes life doesn’t seem worth living anymore but my faith with God will bring me back every time I feel this way!

Response: Thank you Sarah for your question. Life is worth living, if you have any more thoughts that contradict that--please consult your family physician or go to the hospital--you are too important. It has only been 4 months since Christian died, don't be too hard on yourself. Your tears of love and re-visiting (in your mind) the hospital are all quite normal and healthy. You should tell Christian's story often and let everyone know how perfect he was and how beautiful he was to see. Keeping a journal about your feelings may be helpful. As time passes you may want to become involved in an ABS awareness group, maybe even start an ABS support group. Remember, people do not know what to say to you, so don't expect too much from others. Above all, stay close to God and your faith--even though you may at times be angry with God--that is ok. God understands us.